Ribbons, and Hoops, and Leotards, Oh My!

Somebody please explain rhythmic gymnastics to me. I glanced up from my desk only to have my eyes glued to the wall-mounted television that’s constantly tuned to the Olympics. There was a girl flipping her small, bendy, sparkly leotard-clad body in and out of a hoola hoop. “This is an Olympic sport?” I cried. Yes. Apparently it is. Although no one in my office had any idea what it was.

The hoola hooper was followed by a similarly acrobatic girl slicing the air with what appeared to be a whip. I tore my gaze from the screen for just a moment and when I looked up again there were half a dozen whip toting girls prancing along the floor in perfect unison. Hoola hoops? Whips? What sort of competition is this? I was fairly certain that no gold medal is issued for best impression of a dominatrix, so I decided to do some research.

A quick trip to the NBC Olympics website informed me that these girls are rhythmic gymnasts and that the whips are in fact ribbons. I always wanted a Ribbon Dancer as a kid (remember the song in the commercial? “Ribbon Dancer, writing on the wall. Ribbon Dancer, toss it up and let it fall.” No?...okay, just me then). I should have told my Mom it was a surefire path to Olympic glory.

I love how as the weeks drag on, the Olympic games get weirder and weirder. They start off with swimming, running, and regular gymnastics. Beach volleyball’s as extreme as it gets early on. But by the last week we’ve got kyaking, rhythmic gymnastics, BMX racing, and myriad other sports that fall under the category of “Most People Didn’t Know They Were Even In the Olympics.”

So I guess rhythmic gymnastics is to regular gymnastics as synchronized swimming is to just plain old Michael Phelps-kicking-your-ass-swimming. Thank you SAT’s for providing me with a succinct, though rudimentary, way of summing this up.